Graduating.

A Short Note.
Hey Guys so I finally graduated from Sixth form; I spent 7 years in education and now i'm at the point of my life where August results solely decides my next steps for my future; as much as I hate the fact a few grades on a sheet of paper determines my place within university; I have to say hard work should pay off; for those who have worked very hard for the past two years within college/ sixth form I can guarantee you will do well. before I go and binge watch Quantico I just want to end this short note by saying I wish all of you with the best of luck for your future.

I go to seek a great perhaps- François Rabelais

Tears of a husband. (short story)

He wrapped his hand around  Her hands; which were bore pure innocence of a young lady; delicate and sensitive. all his mind could think of was how much he wished he never argued with her that night; all the times he should of told her how much he loved her; those days were gone..far gone.
His cheeks were redder than a red cayenne pepper; his eyes were drained and ragged looking from crying; his thoughts engulfed him; with sadness and memories of once a happy couple, who had a whole future ahead of them; but now they have nothing; but a few old photographs in torned out albums; and frames back home.

Nurse: "Mr Jacobs?"
his body turns to the nurse; a women with ebony skin pressed against white uniform and her breaths facilitated to a more casual cadence.
Mr Jacobs: "yes, what is it?"
Nurse: "I am sorry to disturb you; but if you are ready to, we would like to take the body to make sure we give her Last offices; so we can peacefully give the body to the funeral directors."

All I am is bitter, each other feeling pushed from my being; it was unfair, she was given to me then taken from me all at once, why has the world cursed me with this pain; what have I ever done to deserve such loss? the fragile voice of the nurse broke him out of his thoughts.
Mr Jacobs: nothing came out of him, but a silent nod.
The nurse took his silent nod as a seal of agreement; as she covered the body with a long piece of white cloth, to give the body its last sign of respect from the morgue; just when the nurse was about to leave she spoke to Mr Jacobs; in a sympathetic tone; while positioning her self right night to him.

Nurse: "I want to tell you, that everything will be fine; but that'll mean that I've lied to you, which I do not wish to do. it will be hard at first, seeing the person you love not around you, when you need them the most; but time will allow your loss to heal."
He looks at the nurse with ebony skin; she looked sad in her eyes but tired; from all the night shifts shes been doing these past weeks; he opens his mouth to say a simple thank you to the nurse; but before he could he bursts out of tears in her arms; she cradles him in her arms and whispers soft words of "let it all out", he begins to say words that were hard to understand since it was mumbled through his out burst; "I loved her, I really did, she was my wife...how will I ever forgive myself? I shouldn't have left her that night, I shouldn't have...I should of called the ambulance as soon as I..."
before he could finish what he was saying the nurse interrupted him.
Nurse: "Nothing's your fault, you can't blame yourself for what has happened; the police will find out who did this; all you have ever done was love your wife..." she reassures him while patting his back.
Mr Jacobs: "no you don't understand!" his voice was loud enough for him to break away from her reassurance; he leaped up from the chair that he sat on within the morgue. the nurses face was in shock and frightened from his aggressive tone.

Mr Jacobs: "I killed her."
her face was in absolute stun and terrified, she was in dismay; she developed the strength to talk; the expressions of "what do you mean you killed her?" managed to come out of her mouth.

Mr Jacobs: "I killed her with my bare hands! she shouldn't off done what she did! She had a lover! she's a Lair! she's a whore!"
The nurse got up frantically to leave to get help but he grabbed hold of her wrist and pulled her close, his body weight was to much for her unlock herself from; she tried to scream; but he used his strong masculine veined hands to cover her mouth, "I've told you, now I have to kill you too."

Hey guys I hope you enjoyed my short story, it's different from what I usually write, but sometimes you gotta just try something new; and I can honestly say I enjoyed writing this :).

Author: Rachel A. Robin

Happy writing x

Will You.

Will, you still care for me when I'm old and weak?
Will, you still need me when you've gone for a week?
Will, you still tell me you miss the way I spoke?
Will, you still tell me that our love never broke?
Will, you still tell me everything will be alright?
Will, you still hold me ever so tight?
Will, you still watch me dance in the rain?
Will, you ever help me take away this pain?

Oh please believe me when I said I want to do this all over again.

 A Poem BY Rachel A. Robin

Twisted Iris.

Hey guys I am so excited to share with you an opening page of my book that I am currently working on :) the book is called Twisted iris; which will be published on WattPad in the username @angiereadslots (soon I hope); enjoy reading!

The Blurb:

Iris has just turned 17 who will turn into a moona witch on the day Of Pedlin day like all other 17 year olds' in the land of Montearcus which is the land for witches. iris has been waiting to turn into a moona witch almost all her life and finely the day has arrived little did she know the powers she's about to gain are dark ones.. And only one person can save her from her dark powers.. Who is it? Or what is it?

©Twisted iris By Rachel Angelina Robin

Chapter 1- forbidden

Iris' long dim chocolate hair was tucked behind her ears which streamed down her back on wards, her brown crystallized eyes where pierced into the forested areas, where hazes floated around; she could scarcely see anything, regardless of the fact she had her lantern twisted around her cleared out arm's wrist.

"Crack!" her entire body pivoted and this point her body was shaking out of fear and cold. she lifted up her cleared out arm with the curved lamp around her wrist and made it streak around until she saw cluster of crows flew out of a weeping willow tree...a moan of relief was out of her, the crows twittered while taking off; as she understood that the crows must of took off from the willow tree one must of caused one of the branches to snap of.

she kept strolling into the forested areas, which was a danger and forbidden; particularly on Pedlin day, which was warned and told by almost everyone; particularly by her family; however whenever she asked them, on why it was strictly forbidden; they never had an answer themselves; her father would essentially say to her 'a fool won't tune in; yet an insightful one will'. which implied that she needed to stop asking questions, and simply obey what was told. However rules and obligations never appealed towards Iris; she was strong minded and had a wild heart to match her rebellious ways.

All Iris could consider was about today...it was finally Pedlin day.. which was about 17 year old's that is going to be given the most valuable blessing that any 17 year old could be given; which was the endowment of witch powers, the young men where given moon arc segment powers and the young ladies where given moona arc powers. she has been sitting tight for Pedlin day since she was young and the day has come!

Iris's thought of fear of anyone spotting her in the forest started larking through her veins; as the sudden rush of thought of breaking one of the commandments set by Montearcus delegates which would result to being sentence to death by disobeying the delegations commandments. But iris's rebellious ways made her realise this was a risk she wanted to take; simply because the woods made her nerves at ease; it allowed her to feel calm as if the woods was her only remedy to help her feel less tensed about Pedlin day. when she was in the woods all she could think was the beauty that surrounded her; nothing has ever made her feel this sort of belonging or even calmness; the woods was her save heaven.

Iris admired the weeping willow tree as she sat down next adjacent to it; her dressed hung down close to her, as she admired the hazed sky as she whispered the four words that meant the world to her "The woods, is mine."

Thank you for reading a very short snippet from the first chapter of my book; which is still in works, this is a draft piece; so I may edit/add stuff on to it :) I hope you all enjoyed reading this; and if you have any questions or suggestions please comment down below or email me on:

rachelrobin98@gmail.com

Happy Reading!xo

Rachel A. Robin

Adored

        

His touch became ever so soft; she looked and gazed at his sweet eyes; with ever so being mesmerised; he spoke words; which she held so close to her chest; every little thing he did. she adored, oh how she adored wanting him beside her even more. Four years has passed but yet he sways; she still waits for no tomorrow; oh she adored, oh she adored for nothing more than be loved by him.

A Poem;

By Rachel A. Robin

Happy reading xo

I AM STRONG.

The colour of your skin should not matter, where you are from nationally should not matter, however it matters till this day and many people are so oblivious to see the truth… its right in front of you. I am Indian British and a proud one, but I can honestly say I was once not proud of who I was, and often I tried to hide my ethnic background; and each time someone asked me where I was from I would try to change the topic, since the society groomed me to believe my skin colour and where I was from should be looked down upon, so I did. I hid where I was from; I tried to forget my cultural roots, and for that I am ashamed.

As I got older, I started to realise I lost my sense of purpose of who I really was, since I tried harder every day to please people, in order to fit in within conversations and people in general ,but I never once thought about what it was doing to me inside. Since the more I tried to please everyone around me, the more I was suffocating my existence, I was slowly fading away, far away.

As this problem was eating away inside, I started to develop this dark cloud over me called, depression, and this was honestly spiralling out of control, depression started to not only make every ounce of my life difficult, it made me do things to myself in order for me to feel as if I had some sort of power over this cloud, which only led me to push away people that wanted to help me. I was so depressed, not just because I didn't want to accept who I was; I was also being bullied at school (which only made everything even tougher to handle).

As things got difficult and a conversation with 1 out 2 friends I had at the time, I started to be honest and confided with this friend, who till this day is one of my best friends; it wasn't easy to tell her everything I was feeling and going through and doing to myself, but she got it out of me (She was good at that, and still is). After telling someone for the first time everything I was feeling, she decided to take action, which I begged her not to; but knowing who she was, she didn't listen to me and decided to speak to my mum, at that time I was upset with my friend for telling my mum my deepest and haunting secret, but it is because of her I am still alive. I started to see counsellors and psychologists and was even prescribed to take anti-depressants, after years of counselling within school and getting referred to mental health services also known as CAMHS; I was clinically diagnosed for anxiety and depression.

It took me couple of years of reflection and a question from my counsellor which is still vivid to me; “who are you?” to make me realise I genuinely didn't know who I was.

This is the point in my life I realised I needed to stop pretending and covering who I really was, which is a unicorn. Yes its true guys I am indeed a unicorn, I'm joking, what I'm actually meant to say is I wanted to be confident and happy; as well as find peace within myself; which I managed to do only fully last year. I was given the chance to start fresh, and I indeed took that opportunity, this is when I started to involve myself with people who were positive and had an optimistic outlook on life, which little did they know really helped me within. They accepted who I was; they embraced my weirdness and helped me through the difficult days, and even gave me the strength to love, embrace my cultural roots again.

I have been battling depression and anxiety for nearly 6 years, and no it hasn't magically been cured, there are days when I'm down and there are days when I'm doing good, this dark cloud comes whenever it feels like it, but these days I AM STRONGER, I am not weak. I am not easily breakable, I have been through hell to be where I am now and words can’t explain how grateful and blessed I am to be sat here typing away, because I would of never thought 6 years ago I would have been alive or even enjoying and appreciating my life.

There will be a point where you don’t want to love yourself and you’ll try everything to escape from the reality, but try to understand this, YOU ARE YOU. No one else can be you, or replace you, so learn to love and accept who you are and tell the society to stick it where the sun don’t shine, because honestly your flaws and your highs is what makes you so different from others, so don’t give up on yourself just yet, and don’t keep thinking your life won’t ever get better, because it will, but that depends entirely on you, because YOU HAVE THE POWER on how you want your life to be.

And don’t forget you are a strong individual, if you can fight through this, you can fight through anything.

If anyone of my readers are feeling lonely and needs advice or a friend to talk to please, don’t be hesitant on contacting me on:

rachelrobin98@gmail.com

http://escaperaeann.tumblr.com/

https://twitter.com/Rachelrobinn

I hope all of you enjoyed reading this, and I hope you never give up on yourself, and remember that I am your friend too x

Happy reading

R x

P.s.

♥Special place in my heart, god, my family, my friends and my gran watching over me, thank you all for endless love and support ♥